And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
