2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
