Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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