Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
