I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
