is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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