It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
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