I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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