whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Your cock deserves a montage
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
