Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize