On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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