Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
