At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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