Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i think i have herpe
just one?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
