Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize