Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
