Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
