if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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