Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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