But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
