porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize