Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
We had to coat check the pizza.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
