i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
