do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
