Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Michael Bay diarrhea
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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