i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
