So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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