idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
