I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I have already put on my inside pants.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
