We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
