My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
