I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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