It's Friday. Sex?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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