oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
