I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
