I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.