It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
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You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
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Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
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