WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina just clenched in fear
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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