Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize