Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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