I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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