I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
