Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize