id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
