yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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