there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize