i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
