when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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