know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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