so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
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This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
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Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
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